I watch my children as they go through things that I absolutely remember going through myself and can’t help but feel proud.
I have worked to keep open communication with them all, while firmly keeping the mother child roles in place. I will find out so much later that I missed or messed up on because that is the way that this job works.
However for today I will sit back and allow myself to be proud of them for the choices they make. I will also chose to be proud of the way my husband and I have raised them so far. I look forward to more of these feelings to help counteract the days I feel the polar opposite.
Learning the healthy normal in my relationship is going to be the new challenge in my life. We have forgotten how to function as a couple with all this running around parenting and working.
Recently he has had to switch a different shift that works him an opposite shift as mine. As much as space is something that our relationship thrives from, this may be a little too much space.
So I am looking around at different things that can help us re-center our focus. While I am mainly focused on getting us fun positive time together as a couple, I also would love to strengthen our communication.
Yup, I said it.
That magic “C” word that always gets thrown around in a relationship. Everyone can stand to do a little work in that department, at any point of the relationship. However when we are as strained as we are, I think that it is important.
Check back soon to see if I can get him on board as well. 🙂
The power of learning to be who you are in the face of judgement is daunting. More daunting than most of us have the strength to admit. Even less of us can say that we have beaten the challenge of overcoming.
I have fleeting moments where this clarity hits me that it just doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. As long as I can live with myself and my family doesn’t have to deal with any repercussions from my decisions it shouldn’t matter.
And yet in the exact next breath I am forced to explain to my kids that other people’s perspective really does matter in some situations. If the home room teacher you get in the fifth grade gets the idea that you are a troublemaker within the first few weeks of class, then they tend to watch you more closely and scrutinize the things that you say in a different light, all year. Of course you can break that mold at any point by showing continuous good behavior but the original perception is always right there in the back of their minds.
The teeter tottering of this subject will always be up for debate, with everybody having different opinions from each other. Hell, one persons take on this subject will change so frequently that it is hard to imagine that a person would honestly believe that they have a good leg to even stand on in a debate.
We like to thing that it has a simple answer, in a world where there is very few simple questions. In reality it is a highly complex dilemma that we will battle until our dying day.
It doesn’t matter what type of judgement haunts us since we all have different nightmares.
The way we choose to handle them is completely an individual decision however.