Life goals

Recently I chose to plan posts for a few weeks and take a step back to allow myself to enjoy my holidays with my family.

I realized that I was becoming more and more obsessed with electronics. Thats how the world is working right now for everyone but I chose to try to make an effort.

This worked well ….. at first. But then I of course found other things to become obsessed with on the same electronics. Instead of posts here, i played mindless games. Instead of choosing to learn ore about writing and editing things I want to write, I found myself obsessed with social media platforms.

So that backfired.

So now I picked my writing back up. Both here and personal writing. I picked the journals back up that I write my healthy lifestyle goals, and food choices in.

That’s when I noticed how happy I was when I allowed myself to do them in tha first place. So why did I feel like I needed to change myself?

It’s like I always seem to think I am not doing things good enough. I seem to always notice my failures, even if its just a slight failure while I refuse to give myself kudos for the successes. Not even the little ones.

I am not a resolutions person. I chose to word it as life goals or life choices instead so I don’t allow the well know failure rate of resolutions to affect my mindset. Seems silly but the mid trick seems to help me.

However, I think I found my newest life goal.

❤❤ Thank you for keeping with me readers. Stay healthy and safe, wherever you are.

Did we just become best friends?

Guys, I have a new love. Well semi new.

As the weather gets colder and the world still won’t let me frolic and have fun outside I have had to become creative.

So I found……

True crime documentaries and podcasts!

I have always gone into phases of watching these shows and reading true crime books so this isn’t a brand new thing however this has become fierce.

There is nothing more dangerous then the human mind.

But damn is it interesting!

Happy Turkey Day!

“If you stand in the meat section at the grocery store long enough, you start to get mad at turkeys. There’s turkey ham, turkey bologna, turkey pastrami. Someone needs to tell the turkey, ‘Man, just be yourself.’ “

Ambrose Bierce: American writer, journalist (“The Devil’s Dictionary”)

No words needed

In this Wednesday, April 22, 2020 photo, healthcare workers tend to a patient at one of the intensive care units for COVID-19 patients (ICU) of the Akdeniz University hospital in Antalya, Turkey. The country currently ranks seventh in the world in the number of confirmed infections, surpassing Iran and China. Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan’s government has refrained from imposing a total lockdown, fearing its negative impact on the already fragile economy. It has opted for piecemeal measures instead, including weekend curfews and banning people above the age of 65 and below the age of 20 from leaving their homes. (Ibrahim Laleli/DHA via AP)

Let me be honest, I have had to unpack my feelings and opinions over this pandemic in multiple ways. When this pandemic started these were the pictures that came from New York. These images actually all came from a simple google search where I typed in ‘New York covid nurses’.

Today, while the numbers are starting to rise again I can’t imagine how this will be painted on media platforms. The change of opinions from people has made this move to seem as if these may not be hero’s that are sacrificing everything to help your fellow human to survive this novel infection. Suddenly these people are exaggerating and making things seem worse then it is from most people.

Remember to thank your healthcare workers, your front line workers, your fellow humans that don’t run away and act like this isn’t a real problem. Listen when they say to live your life, just in a safer way, but thank them. They have seen things that they can not un-see. They are very aware of the realness of this pandemic. Respect them.

Nailed it

One need not be a chamber to be haunted. One need not be a house. The brain has corridors surpassing material place.

– Emily Dickinson –

There are some sayings or poems that just speak to you. Every one of us have corridors that are filled with doorways and archways. Maybe even a few windows.

I have spent my life teaching myself and now my children to learn how to shut those doors and windows. Sometimes I shut it too early. Sometimes I shut it amazingly too late. Sometimes I can’t even manage to close it, more or less keep it closed.

My amazing mother used this method to teach me as I was growing up. I am so lucky to have parents that have been through some shit to be able to handle me, and the path my life would take.

I am not that unusual but my story is. Most people don’t like to hear it all. They cut me off or they move on thinking it’s too heavy. Some tell me everyone has their cross to bear. I agree.

So instead of telling my story and dealing with my reaction to other people’s reactions, I shut doors.