I blinked

Growing up I had a very hard time connecting with other girls. I was one of the boys thru and thru. Don’t get me wrong, I had a few close girl friends that I considered my best friends. However, I always felt a little on edge with them compared to the ease I felt when I was with guys.

As I hit upper grade school and high school timing this became worse since I felt like every single time I opened up to a female she would use that against me in some way. Sometimes just by taking what I said in confidence and blabbing it to the class. Other times it was more descreet, more like a slow manipulation of information that they know used against me to make me do what they want. I am not positive if I did the same to them or not. There are times that come to mind that have the potential to land in that category but as I am looking and justifying it to myself, I obviously have to accept the rose colored glasses theory.

As an adult, I CRAVE the women to women connection. I need to have girl talks, where they can understand me completely in regard to things I am dealing with. I need to speak to other wives or long term girlfriends that can face similar relationship speed bumps. Same for any woman raising kids of any age. I know that every one goes through stages like this in life so I don’t feel like this is strange at all.

I love connecting with single or divorced women that have been through things that I haven’t. I love talking to new moms, learning the new path that they are on just as much as I love talking to woman who are enjoying retirements, freedom to travel and possible grandbabies. I love them all.

When the hell did this switch?

Side note: I still find myself just as talkative and comfortable being around guys, unless I like them in which I will be insanely awkward.

Author: Bookstore owners daughter

Mom. Wife. Woman. Pet lover. Survivor. Medical Miracle. Fertile Myrtle. Sister. Daughter. Granddaughter. Book lover.

4 thoughts on “I blinked”

  1. I like your ending paragraph. I was never a “guys, guy” and not what I would call a “typical guy” even now. Though not gay I feel more comfortable with women than guys. I don’t crave being with guys and would like better doing things with my GF.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. For as long as I can remember, I’ve always been sorrounded more by girls than guys. I’ve always felt better being around girls than around guys. My best friend is a girls, and some of my closest friends are as well, with maybe one or two guys thrown in. I’ve always found it easier to open up to a girl. However, that becomes way more difficult than it should be if I happen to fall in love with one of them.. All the more so since I have Cerebral Palsy.

    Liked by 1 person

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