The power of learning to be who you are in the face of judgement is daunting. More daunting than most of us have the strength to admit. Even less of us can say that we have beaten the challenge of overcoming.
I have fleeting moments where this clarity hits me that it just doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. As long as I can live with myself and my family doesn’t have to deal with any repercussions from my decisions it shouldn’t matter.
And yet in the exact next breath I am forced to explain to my kids that other people’s perspective really does matter in some situations. If the home room teacher you get in the fifth grade gets the idea that you are a troublemaker within the first few weeks of class, then they tend to watch you more closely and scrutinize the things that you say in a different light, all year. Of course you can break that mold at any point by showing continuous good behavior but the original perception is always right there in the back of their minds.
The teeter tottering of this subject will always be up for debate, with everybody having different opinions from each other. Hell, one persons take on this subject will change so frequently that it is hard to imagine that a person would honestly believe that they have a good leg to even stand on in a debate.
We like to thing that it has a simple answer, in a world where there is very few simple questions. In reality it is a highly complex dilemma that we will battle until our dying day.
It doesn’t matter what type of judgement haunts us since we all have different nightmares.
The way we choose to handle them is completely an individual decision however.